THE RAT

I recently started my own NYC satirical paper called The Rat.

WILLIAMSBURG—A Brooklyn super used his position to win around $100,000 by placing bets on the prediction market Kalshi about whether he would show up to fix a leaky sink, the company said on Thursday.
New Yorkers Line Up to Try the Viral Cyclospora Parasite
Wildfires Turn Sun Into Strawberry ‘Rita Buzz Ball
MIDTOWN—New York City's street steam has been traced back to an underground fajita ring, the NYPD said Monday.
MIDTOWN—A high-rise building on 42nd St announced Tuesday that it would rather collapse and die than live in Midtown.
WEST VILLAGE—Eager to take the next step in their relationship, a Manhattan couple announced Sunday that they’re finally ready to move out together.
Fire Escape Saves Woman’s Tan
TERMINAL B—The Port Authority of New York is celebrating after a new consumer survey ranked John F. Kennedy International Airport No. 1 in customer meltdown videos. “It’s an incredible honor,” said Port Authority Executive Di
Dog in Knicks Jersey Can’t Even Name Three Players
FIFTH AVE—The CEO of Alo, a luxury activewear and yoga lifestyle brand, announced this morning that the logo does “kinda look like a penis.” “Honestly, when we first designed it, I didn’t see it. But now, looking at it
Back Sweat Up 96%
JAMAICA—Noah and Samantha Horowitz are calling it “the luckiest day of their lives” after winning an all-expenses-paid trip to Jamaica, Queens. “We can’t believe it” said Samantha, who’s never traveled more
Con Edison to Remove ‘Con’ from Name
Buffalo Exchange Offers Woman $10 Cash or $15 Store Credit for Her Soul
TERMINAL B — The first baby was baptized in the LaGuardia Airport fountain Monday. The ceremony, originally scheduled for 1 p.m. Sunday, was delayed to 2:45 p.m., then 3:15 p.m., then canceled and rescheduled for 1.pm. Monday. As guests arri

And of course made some stickers.

Next

INSIDE MY BRAIN